The World Out There

Recently I had been hit by this, the more I learn about different aspects of life; the more vulnerable I feel. I was never satisfied with the thought of settling in one place forever. Since I have left the city I have come to known as home this past spring, I realized that I had been playing around in the shallow side of the pool, thinking the deep end is the rest of the world, when in reality there is a vast sea out there. With knowledge brings desire; the desire to know more, to be inspired and to inspired. Will this hunger ever be satisfied?

I am often overwhelmed with the feeling that there is something missing in my life. I do not know what it is, I am searching for it. Will there ever be an end to the search? Will I ever want an end to this search? After all, life is about experiencing. If I ever find this missing piece will life still be worth living?

Different Like Coco

I had plans to watch Star Trek with a friend today. We got to the theater 10mins before the show to get tickets and the seats that were left were quite bad. The choices came down to the first 3 rows in front of the screen. We opted for watching something else. I wasn’t really in the mood for a chick flick at first but I figured what the heck, the movie had pretty good reviews. “Coco before Chanel” was a wonderful surprise. Coco Chanel was a modern woman ahead of her time. She knew what she wanted and is determined. Yet the movie also portrayed her to embody very feminine weaknesses. She was afraid when she decided to accept her independence in Paris. It touched my heart. I have new found admiration for her after watching the movie. I long to know more about her life and be inspired by a great woman like her.

Chanel had done some amazing branding to the masses in the past two years. I am converted after the art mobile exhibition and this biography about Coco Chanel. I know the movie isn’t related to the company but it definitely boosted the company’s image. I am in love with them now. My favorite fashion icons Coco Chanel and the most elegant Carolina Herrera.

Contradictions & Dilemmas

A friend once casually commented “You run away from your problems”. It made me think; it seems like that is indeed what I have been doing all along. I, like all others, seek inner peace. In doing so, I avoid anything that I deem may cause emotional pain. I am emotionally lazy according to another friend. I would go to the extent of cutting a person off completely just to avoid taking chances. I am here half way across the globe from the city I grew up in, because I felt insecure. I have not a single idea if the comfortable setting that I worked so hard to obtain will remain. It has actually started falling apart, throwing me off guard. It is suffocating to think I am no longer in control. For these, I left on my journey to prove to myself things are still in my own hands.

I get frustrated when friends at home make it seem like it was easy for me to take this step. “Good, I hope you stay there (whichever city I end up being, away from home), because then I have an excuse to go there.” No, I don’t think it is that simple. I am out here alone to have to forge the connections I had from scratch again. No actually it is not that easy, I try not to think about it. But in the end it is my choice to run away.

The City with Cranes (everywhere)

While I was expected the dramatic music of “Shanghai Tan” playing in the background and the Huang Pu River running wild on the side as I approach the Bund. Well, that didn’t quite happened. Instead I was welcomed by cranes and construction detours. It is quite unfortunate that the Art Deco buildings at the river front are blocked by ongoing constructions for the 2010 world expo. But, all for the better future.



I was strolling down a side street on my way to the Old City and came across this sweet little local neighborhood. Historic houses which are a bit rundown but with a personal touch, street vendors on the main street in the community selling all sorts of fresh produces, alley ways that lead to the inner courtyards of the living quarters. I feel like I was transported to a different era. Something not from this mega metropolis.

Goodbye My Love, see you in two months

I am going to write on this as much as possible :) Let’s see how long this would last. I am at the British Airways airport lounge. The wireless connection wouldn’t work for some weird reason. I will blame this on Vista. But you know what I am not complaining. The super nice attendant at Cathy Pacific who checked me in decided to upgrade my 15 hr, 15 Hours! flight to business class. Thinking about how dreadful it would be to be in that tiny seat in the back for 15 long hours is already painful. So glad, uber nice lady!

xo,
n